Self Control is the Best Control (If you can't do it yourself, no one else can)

Overviews

We see many people in our lives trying to control us. There can be different forms of control. These include advice, suggestions, comments, reprimands, intimidation, threats, repeated examinations, assigning responsibilities for complex tasks again by again, and backbiting in society etc. All of these efforts might divert us from our way slightly or more. In some cases, we are walking in the wrong direction, which may be mistaken for what we think is right. In this case, the progressive controls will guide us in the right direction.

We are afraid of the ones we love the most or the ones we respect the most. This fear is dear. Remember, parental control will never be in vain. It would not be appropriate for us to directly reject or react negatively to the control efforts of Parents, best wishers, or even of others. Instead of this, we can cleverly pick up diamonds and leave the sand there. We have a beautiful gift given by nature which is self control. But, how does it work? We are going to discuss this here.

1. Controls at Home

Controls at home include the controls by parents, grandparents, siblings, and relatives. This group can also include domestic workers. But the advice or suggestions of these workers can be difficult words for us. Sometimes we are doing things that our family does not know and we are feeling inside that it is very harmful for us. And, there are some things that our family knows, but we disobey their orders and support our own young stubbornness. For example, hanging out with bat friends, getting addicted, staying out late at night, not paying attention to the parents' objections to the dresses, closing the door and not reading under the pretext of reading, using electronic devises and enjoying the imaginary world more than the real one, being angry over small things and not eating etc. Even though all of these habits are bad, we are not able to distinguish between good and bad. Parents are always working tirelessly to correct these bat habits. We often accuse our parents of interfering in our lives and not allowing us to live independently. Our single-mindedness conquers the conscience that our parents care for us and that it is for us. If you can't easily accept family control, your future will be dark.

Self Control

If the family's advice is followed, the problem will be solved. If it does not seem possible, we can take self-control measures. For this, the first thing we have to do is look at our inner soul. Is there any instruction for us? From God or Nature. Are we sent with a special gift? Each person is given a gift from God. We must work to find that gift, to follow that instruction, and to set our purpose and establish God's plan. We have to think about whether anything we do contributes to that goal. If not, we need to stop doing that immediately. If we can remind our mind of this, then the guidance of the parents will be nectar for us and we will become their obedient children.

2. Controls in Office

Controls in office are often professional. A control system is established in the office. With the help of this, control work is carried out by assigning a task to someone, evaluating the performance, finding out if there is any difference between assigned work and achievement and finding out the reasons for the difference and corrective measures are taken. Sometimes, even in case of non-compliance with the rules of the company or breaking or abusing the authority, an explanation is sought and the management decides for action. It can also be considered a kind of professional control.

Here we are discussing non-professional control. There are three types of people around us in the office- our boss (or seniors), our co-workers and junior staff. Of these, colleagues and juniors do not try to control us, but rather they compete with us and share knowledge. Apart from these, we feel that some types of seniors have repeatedly tried to control us unprofessionally only for fulfilling their personal needs or interests. When a boss of this nature tries to control us, we will never try to change our behavior or attitude. Sometimes we are lucky to be led by the right leader, but when we can't change our own behaviors, we risking our career. Fighting with friends and seniors for small reasons, wasting time without work, being late for office and trying to return home early, trying to abuse available resources and authorities, not doing what the boss says right away (priority), trying to work with our single-mindedness etc. are our anti-career development habits. It needs to be rectified immediately.

Self Control

Habit change is also related to self control. No one can change or control us. But we can control ourselves. It is in our own hands. Our mind listens and obeys our soul. The self control method mentioned in point no.1 for control at home also applies here.

3. Controls by Lovers

We don't get much control from our friends. However husband and wife or girlfriend and boyfriend try to control each other more. You have to dress like this, you have to eat like this, go to this place, don't go to that place, talk to it, don't talk to it, do it, don't do that. They have a lot of ways to control us. These are positive positive controls. We should not forcibly control each other in relationships. 

We can see that self-control in relationships also helps to make the relationships sustainable. General control is fine, but we should not try to control our partners too much. We see a growing rift in the relationship between husband and wife due to misunderstandings. The issue of betrayal cannot be resolved. But if there is a misunderstanding or a small issue, there is need for improvement; there is a need for self-control. 

Self Control

We can solve the problem together or forget the problem. In the event of a war of words, one should immediately shut up. Put cold water in the mouth and run it in the mouth for 15 minutes. It will act as a medicine given by a Sage. Remember those happy moments you spent with each other. Disagreements between us will neither achieve our material purpose or the happiness of the soul. Attempts should be made to bring happiness from at least one person. It would be better to teach a lesson with love than with a word.

4. Controls in School

The school is considered as a temple of education. The teachers play the role of the priest while the devotees are the students themselves. Here discipline is given high importance. It will be the duty of students to follow the discipline and in case of breaking the discipline he/she will be punished. Punishment is also given for not completing homework and class works. Similarly, their own bad habits can also create an uncomfortable in the school. These can cause them to lose control. The future can lead to uncertainty.

Self Control

Even if our parents, teachers, principals, or friends cannot improve our habits, we can. The student's job is simply to read, play, complete the given homework, be disciplined and good marks in the exams. You probably know the life cycle of a butterfly. A butterfly flies when she reaches the fourth and final stage of her life cycle. In other three stages, she does not even try to fly. She enjoys completing her duties in the same conditions in which she is. Students also learn from this. You are in the study stage now. The elder man did this, I should do it too, eat it, I will eat it too, don't follow them, only learn from them about knowledge. Do not try to fly in larva stage. By considering these things, students can get rid of their bad habits.

In many other situations like these, we can avoid distractions through self-control. Our purpose, family and love should be the first priority, for this the power of the mind should be expended , nothing else can distract us.